Banned Book 5 - Harry Potter

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone - J.K. Rowling, Mary GrandPré Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets - J.K. Rowling, Mary GrandPré Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban - J.K. Rowling, Mary GrandPré Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire - J.K. Rowling, Mary GrandPré Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - J.K. Rowling, Mary GrandPré Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince - J.K. Rowling, Mary GrandPré Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - J.K. Rowling, Mary GrandPré

                It should come as no surprise to people that Harry Potter has been banned and challenged in the US and other places because magic automatically means you are a devil worshiper.

 

                But I want to talk about something else when it comes to Potter.

 

                Seriously, people are upset about the sexual part?

 

                What the hell?

 

                What book are they reading?  What porn?  Where is it?  I missed it!  I’ve been cheated!

 

                Kissing, you mean kissing is porn?

 

                So when a mother kisses her child on the head  . . . . ICK!

 

                You have a sick mind people.

 

                What do you mean the booze?   Isn’t butter beer like root beer?  Fire-whiskey?  They’re in the UK for god’s sakes!  Not every country is as anal as the US when it comes to drinking ages.  What do you think Santa drinks when he leaves presents?

 

                What do you mean milk?  Santa wants whiskey, cookies, and a pipe.

 

                And so what if Dumbledore is gay!  You’re just upset that he doesn’t get it on with McGonagall.

 

                Yes, I said it.

 

                Oh, the magic.  Seriously, if you don’t want to read magic that’s fine.  Shit, if you don’t want to read it because the hero is a white guy that’s fine too.  Keep your mitts off my copy, however.

 

                Plus, haven’t you ever wanted to zap something with a magic wand?  I mean, I suppose you could debate the wisdom of having magic doing everything, the treatment of house elves, the disregard for muggles, and female characters.  All valid points.  But don’t kids pretend to be animals?  How is that different than transforming into cat?

 

                Ah, go tell to Philip Pullman.

 

 

(Sorry, just couldn't write a serious one after reading this.)